My fave Simpsons quotes

My fave Simpsons quotes Tue 6 Jun 06 19:37
Homer: [Looking at a globe map...country being Uruguay]
Hee hee! Look at this country! 'You are gay.'

Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Marge: Homer, is this how you pictured married life?
Homer: Yeah, pretty much, except we drove around in a van solving mysteries.

Homer: Hey boy! Wanna play catch?
Bart: No thanks dad.
Homer: When a son doesn't want to play catch with his father something is definitely wrong.
Grandpa Simpson: I'll play catch with you!
Homer: Go home.

Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

Marge; Grandpa, are you sitting on the apple pie?
Grandpa: I sure hope so...

Announcer: Your cable television is experiencing difficulties. Please do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations, as years of TV radiation have left your genitals withered and useless.
Wiggum (checking): Well I'll be damned.

Homer: You couldn't fool your own mother on the foolingest day of your life with an electrified fooling machine!

Homer: No offense Apu, but when they're handing out religions you must be out taking a whizz.
Apu: Mr. Simpson, pay for your purchases and get out...and come again.

Comic Book Guy: These “Bat Pants” have been shredded by the Riddler.
Dry Cleaner Clerk: No, just your ass.
Comic Book Guy: That’s what I call my ass.